最新英語笑話幽默網文

    時間:2024-11-23 02:44:20 英語笑話 我要投稿
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    最新英語笑話幽默網文

      Psychiatrist

    最新英語笑話幽默網文

      Jerry went to a psychiatrist.

      "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble.

      Every time I get into bed,

      I think there's somebody under it.

      I'm going crazy!"

      Just put yourself in my hands for one year,"

      said the shrink.

      "Come to me three times a week,

      and I'll cure your fears.

      " How much do you charge?"

      A hundred dollars per visit.

      " I'll sleep on it," said Jerry.

      Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street.

      "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?"

      asked the psychiatrist.

      For a hundred bucks a visit?

      The bartender cured me for $10."

      "Is that so!

      How?

      " He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"

      Ain't nobody under there now!!!

      杰瑞去看精神病醫生。“醫生,我有些不對勁。每次睡覺的時候,我都感覺有人在床下。我要瘋了!”

      “給我一年時間,”醫生說,“每周來三次,我會治好你。”

      “費用是多少呢?”

      “每次一百美元。”“我會認真考慮的。”杰瑞答道。

      六個月后醫生和杰瑞在街上相遇了,“為什么你再也沒來呢?”醫生問。

      “一次一百塊錢嗎?有個酒吧服務生收了十塊錢就把我治好了。”

      “真的?他怎么做到的?”

      An Entrance Examination

      入學考試

      In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music,the teacher asked one of the boys,"What is the most important physiological quality of a musician”

      在一次音樂學院的入學考試中,老師問一位應試的小伙子:“音樂家最重要的生理素質是什么?”

      "To be deaf,”replied the boy.

      “耳聾。”小伙子回答說。

      "Nonsense”said the teacher angrily

      “胡說!”老師憤怒地說。

      "Why, sirs Don't you know that the most famous musician Beethoven was deaf?”the boy asked in reply disdainfully.

      “怎么了,先生!您難道連鼎鼎大名的音樂家貝多芬是個聾子都不知道嗎?”小伙子輕蔑地反問道。

      Visiting A Chicken Farm

      參觀養雞場

      One day,a teacher took his pupils to a chicken farm to pay a visit. When they came near the incubator,a chick just got out of it’s eggshell.

      老師帶學生到養雞場參觀,當他們走近孵化器時,剛好一只小雞破殼而出。

      "It's wonderful to see a little thing come out from the eggshell,isn't it's it?”the teacher said.

      “看見一個小生命從蛋殼里出來,很奇妙,是不是?”老師說。

      "Yes,sir,"said one of the boys,“But it would be more wonderful if we knew that how a chick gets into its eggshell beforehand.”

      “是的,老師,”一個男學生說,“可是,如果我們知道它是怎樣事先鉆進蛋殼里的那就更奇妙了。”

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